I Be Illin'

You know what sucks about being mildly ill? Not much. You stay home from school/work, you pump fluids, you watch a lot of bad(ly awesome) tv and totally have an excuse for it. Sure, you're typically blowing your nose until you wish it would just fall off already, but it's not that bad.

On the other hand, you know what sucks about being ragingly sick, bone tired, racked with stomach pains (and other worse things I won't be getting into) and over CHRISTMAS BREAK and days away from a 4-hour roadtrip to a New Year's Eve party and wedding, no less? EVERYTHING.

To add insult to injury I went to the doctor this morning, which is one of the top ten least fun activities mankind has created. You go, sit in a germ-infested waiting room for 20 minutes, then you get weighed (which is actually a verified ancient torture method for females, I promise), then some overly chipper nurse makes you tell her all the embarrassing things going on inside your embarrassing body, then she pricks your finger and takes approximately a pint of blood one freaking drop at a time, then sticks 6-inch long Q-tips up your nose, then tells you to go pee in a cup (except you totally peed at home before you left so then you're in the doctor's bathroom and its super awkward and you're wondering if you should ask for some water to drink or what and just hoping they don't make you do it over again if the first sample was inadequate), then you have to wait some more and then the doctor - who you aren't sure is even a doctor or just a nurse - tells you you don't have the flu and it's probably just a stomach virus, but they aren't positive, so be sure to go to the emergency room over the weekend if it gets worse, that will be $25 thanks bye!

Sorry if that was too much information.

All of this is to say, being sick sucks.
And shitty general practitioners do too.

eHoarding

Before I came home, I got all my documents and songs and videos and pictures and Internet bookmarks transferred from my old computer to my fancy new one, and in doing so, I reaffirmed an fundamental truth about myself.

I am a minor-league hoarder.

I mean, I'm not going to be showing up on A&E anytime soon, but I definitely tend to keep things rather than throw them out.

I ran into them again a few months ago, before my mom and I threw a massive garage sale to raise money for my big move to Boston. I had kept the most random shit from my 22 years of live. What's worse, I had moved a lot of it here from Utah! There were things still in the moving boxes from eight and a half years ago, clearly untouched. I found newspaper articles from the 8th grade, books I hadn't looked at since the 5th grade and - worst, or perhaps best, of all - my Lisa Frank club binder from the 3rd grade.

(Don't worry, I took pictures for posterity before putting that thing out of its misery:)

The club rules as written by the club president ( I was totz VP)

Luckily, in the case of the garage sale my moneylust was just slightly higher than my desire to hoard and I cleaned out a LOT of stuff that I will never need or want ever again. Some trash, some donations and plenty of sales led to a much less stuff-laden Kathleen.

My hoarding tends to stem not from some psychological trauma or need, but from three basic rationalizations:
Rationalization 1: "What if I need it at some future point?"
Rationalization 2: "I paid good money for that."
Rationalization 3: "It's sentimental!"

But then there's ehoarding, and although rationalization #2 doesn't typically apply, there's a new problem: space. For physical things, I only have so much space, and I'm not into climbing over boxes and stacks of shit to get to my bathroom, so at some point that shit's gotta go. But on my computer and in my email, I can keep every document I could ever need (and many, many more that I don't), and it never feels like its taking up space.

But I know that in reality, it is. So I am making it my goal to keep this shiny beautiful computer clear of all the crap I kept stored on my last one. Starting with cleaning out over 15,000 pictures. From just the last three years. I KNOW. Ridiculous. Gots. Ta. Go.

On the Eleventh Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

 eleven advil tablets!

Today all I want is advil and water and sleep, because I am massively hung over due to hosting our family Christmas party which mostly ended up being mom and dad's friends circled up in the kitchen eating and chatting and the younger, Millsaps-slash-CHS academic team crew piling up on the couch and catching up while throwing back drink after drink but largely forgetting to eat, and also because I hadn't prepared anything for the eleventh day but I'm determined to try to get all these dang blog posts done because when I have an idea I stick to it, damn it, even when I really should have picked a holiday song with less numbers. 

Merry holidays and happy Christmas and peace on earth, y'all.

...ten finger puppets
nine awesome apps

eight catnip eyeballs

seven Anthropologie aprons

six fannypacks for your head

FIVE POTTER PRESENTS

four snuggie knockoffs

three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s): bleeerrrggghhh

On the Tenth Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

ten finger puppets!

Because just imagine the magnificent stories you could come up with involving broccoli, Bob Ross, a gnome, the Loch Ness Monster, a kitty cat, toast with grape jelly, Joan from Mad Men, a triceratops, baby Jesus in the manger, and Edgar Allen Poe + raven... I know! It's almost too good. 

...nine awesome apps

eight catnip eyeballs

seven Anthropologie aprons

six fannypacks for your head

FIVE POTTER PRESENTS

four snuggie knockoffs

three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s): ridiculous... ly awesome

(Find them HERE: broccoli, Bob, gnome, Nessie, kitty, toast, Joan, dino, Jesus, Poe)

these are my obsessions

[Please sing the title of this blog to the tune of Usher's "Confessions," preferably acappella.]

Oh em gee, y'all.

WHY was I not born with the voice I so clearly and desperately DESERVE?!?

I have recently become obsessed with the Sing Off, this totally underrated reality show where acappella groups compete for fame and glory and money, yadda yadda. It is SO GOOD. My parents and I have been watching it every night, marathon-style (thank you tiny baby Jesus for the wonders of Tivo) and tonight is the finale.

It started with ten groups, from the Whiffenpoofs of Yale fame (best. name. ever.) to these old guys that they keep harping on about being "legends" but really don't have the voices they had twenty years ago and they should have been eliminated the first day to these bros from the University of Oregon to this ballin' group

I haven't always agreed with the judging (see previous paragraph regarding old dudes) but overall I am super impressed with the groups left in the competition. Plus Ben Folds is on the judges panel, and his geeky, yet genius, insights are perfection.

What these people can do with their mouths is INCREDIBLE (not like that!! get your mind out of the gutter). They make it sound like an entire orchestra is onstage when there is not a single instrument present. There's drums and bass and layers and layers of singing and it is just so cool.

Like these adorbz bois from Huntsville:


And these guys, also holding it down for the south from Nashville:


And this group of energetic youngsters:


The third group also features this badass beat-boxing lady:


EDIT: Yay, Committed! They were super cute, all had great voices AND did a cover of "I Want it That Way" so clearly they were a great choice for the win!

Note: I don't know why the formatting of the videos and words together is so screwy :(

club Corinth: membership not granted

Every time I come back to Corinth, Mississippi, I always end up avoiding the "Corinthness" of it in one way or another. I choose to stay in and drink wine with my parents, or spend time with Brian and his family or party with other Millsapians who are also avoiding the Corinthness of our town.

It’s not because I don’t love Corinth, I do. Where else can you take ripped jeans into a little old lady and pick them up, patched wonderfully, less than 24 hours later? Where else can you go to a restaurant where the owner, chef and all the waitresses not only know your name, but also what you are going to order as soon as you walk in? Where else can you get a huge breakfast of homemade biscuits and sausage and eggs and coffee and more for under five dollars (as long as you have cash)?

Small town life in Mississippi definitely has its perks.

But it contains an interesting paradox. People here are the nicest you’ll ever meet, but they still won’t accept you as one of their own if you aren’t. There is a subtle yet overriding sense that we are outsiders here, even after almost nine years. We'll never quite escape the "You're not from around here, are you?" questions, the comments on our accent, the snubbing of honors that ended up going to less deserving, but Corinth born-and-raised, people (yes I still hold a small amount of bitterness from high school).

We’re not the right religion, our grandmas don’t live down the corner, we didn’t go to elementary school, high school and college with the same group of friends from birth, and we don't like collard greens. 

Who knows, maybe if we had made the decade mark we would be let into the mafia inner circle. But since I now call Boston home, and my parents are moving out of Mississippi in the new year, I guess we won’t find out.

Corinth has been a great place to live during high school and come back to from college. I made great friends, many of which I’ve sadly lost touch with over the years. I wouldn’t change living here. But when my parents move away and I no longer have a reason to call it ‘home,’ the feeling of being an outsider here won’t be anything new. 

On the Ninth Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

nine awesome apps!

By now, my true love's hard-earned bacon is getting spent pretty quickly, what with double slankets and cap sacs and Anthropologie aprons, so I'm going to give him a break on the ninth day and just get some apps. Because in this age of technological over-saturation (my favorite topic), I can't ever have too many things available to me at the touch of a button.

just a sampling

So let's see what we have here:
Echofon for Twitter: I tweet, therefore I am
Plants vs. Zombies: killing zombies, all day erry day
LOLcats: guilty
Bergdorf Goodman's Today's Shoe: show me the pretty
New York Times: keeping up with the homeworks
TV Guide: for seeing when Jeopardy is on
Hey Tell: walkie talkies are only slightly cooler
IMDb: reading about every movie I've ever seen, and several I haven't
Mobile RSS: so I can catch up on my blogz, anytime, anywhere

...eight catnip eyeballs

seven Anthropologie aprons

six fannypacks for your head

FIVE POTTER PRESENTS

four snuggie knockoffs

three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s): awesome

(Find them HERE)

adventures with kittens: flying high

Hello from 36,000 feet!

I'm sitting here on a plane, with my kitteh on my lap, my man next to me, a whiskey and cranberry in my hand (that only cost $1.29! Whauuuuuut?*) and no exams to speak of. Today is a good day.

But getting to this point has been quite the adventure. I had an exam Wednesday morning, turned my final project in that afternoon, went to a job interview, met some other TAs for a group grading party, took my computer to the Apple store** and then numbly ate Special K for dinner while staring at CSI. All this after less than four hours of sleep. So Thursday rolled around and I had one day to clean, pack, get Penny ready and do a hundred other menial things to be ready to get to this moment. Long story short, at about midnight-30 I was panicking about everything left on my (lengthy) to-do list and Brian was wishing I'd chill the hell out and Penny was wondering what in the world all those suitcases were for and why I kept trying to get her to enjoy sitting in a little teeny carrier.

To those that know me, it's needless to say that I spent most of the night making lists in my head and trying to remember not to forget stuff and worrying about how my lil girl was going to survive her first flight.

But somehow, we made it through the last-minute packing craziness (including switching everything from my suitcase into a whole new one because I clearly need all seven pairs of these shoes and, even after laying on it, there was no way that sucker was going to zip), the carrying a pet onto the T craziness (of course we got on it at the same time as 854247996 cynical Bostonians on their way to work) and the security craziness (Penny did NOT enjoy having to leave her carrier and go through the metal detector with deafening noises and chaotic smells everywhere)... and here we are.

Thanks for the free wi-fi Delta, and here we come Mississippi!!

* We definitely brought our own mini bottles of booze, put them in the plastic baggie of liquids and security waved it on through. Genius.
** Yes, I have finally joined the ranks of the tech-savvy, Mac-obsessed generation! Think my students will think I'm cool now?

On the Eighth Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

eight catnip eyeballs! 

Of course there has to be at least one present for lil Penny! And when shopping for this discerning fluffball, catnip is key. She is obsessed with the catnip-filled mouse toys she currently has, and performs leaps and bounds and acro-cat tricks while chasing them around the apartment (see video).

But mice are passe. I can't wait to see her batting, gnawing on and running after EYEBALLS. There's nothing cuter than that, am I right?

this cat wishes he was as cute as Penny

this cat wishes he was with a cat as cute as Penny

...seven Anthropologie aprons

six fannypacks for your head
FIVE POTTER PRESENTS
four snuggie knockoffs

three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s): ridiculous (and a little awesome)

(Find it HERE)

On the Seventh Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

seven Anthropologie aprons!

click to see all the glorious details

Who WOULDN'T want to spend the day cooking delicious yum yumz if they got to do it wearing such beautiful aprons? And with so many different gorgeous designs*, you can get one for each day of the week!

Or conversely, you could get one for each of the seven dishes you know how to make. In my case, I would have an apron each for quiche lorraine, lasagna, pancakes, potatoes au gratin, eggs (in omelette or fried form), cupcakes... and cereal. That cereal 'pron would get quite the workout.

I actually do love to cook and host parties and have an apron that I wear as I prance around the kitchen pretending to be a grown-up. I love pouring a glass of wine and cooking a real dinner for Brian when he comes home. It's my secret Stepford split personality. Unfortunately grad school (and the absurd amount that I procrastinate for grad school) typically keeps me from doing such cooking. Instead, I'm usually throwing a frozen pizza in the oven while wearing a sweatshirt and the same jeans I've had on for a week and trying to figure out how to turn two pages of quotes into three pages of a profile.

Which is why I need one (or a week's worth) of these beauties. Hell, I might even learn to cook more than seven things. 

...six fannypacks for your head
FIVE POTTER PRESENTS
four snuggie knockoffs

three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s): awesome

(Find them HERE)

* Of course Anthropologie would make aprons prettier than most of the dresses I own. Damn them.

On the Sixth Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

six fanny packs for your head!

Few know this about me, but I am an ardent supporter of the fanny pack. Life would be so much easier if fanny packs were socially acceptable. I think about this all the time. So imagine my surprise and joy the day I discovered THESE exist. The "cap sac." Tagline? A fanny pack for your head.

Yes, that's right. A fanny pack for your head.

Doesn't it sound just glorious?

So if you haven't figured it out, the front there unzips to hold cell phones, money, cameras... Anything you'd need at DisneyWorld, basically. And check out how many colors there are! I already got one for all the members of my zexy sistah family (spoiler alert!) and there's still like NINE more colors available.

I can't wait to carry my important items around in a sassy red fanny pack... FOR MY HEAD. 

...FIVE POTTER PRESENTS

four snuggie knockoffs

three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s): AWESOME

(Find it HERE)

adventures with kittens: puppy love?

I believe Penny thinks she is a dog.

And sometimes a meerkat.
And sometimes a raccoon.
And sometimes a human.

But mostly a dog. Besides chasing her own tail and sleeping with her tongue out, one weekend while I was in NYC, Brian taught her to play fetch and now it is her favorite game EVERRRRRR.

Observe:





I have the best cat in. the. world.

P.s. Check out our Christmas tree! We decorated it with ornaments from the dollar store, ribbon and ornaments we made out of construction paper. And no, none of those things are reasons to pity it. It is awesome. (Except when Penny knocks it over and/or breaks the things on it).

P.p.s. That really angry sound you hear in the first video is our heater. The joys of living in a 100-year-old Boston brownstone.

On the Fifth Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me
FIVE POTTER PRESENTS!!

There are 23 pages of (just movie related) merchandise on Warner Brother's gift shop, plus the countless other Harry-centric sites, which means there is a ton of cheesetastic Harry Potter merchandise out there.

for example, this is a HAT, y'all

But since it would be impossible to pick only five absurd things, here are five things I actually think are really cool and would unashamedly would wear and/or use and/or drink out of:

Represent.

I don't think this (the necklace, not the book) necessarily screams Harry Potter... at least, not to the 2% of the world who haven't read the books or seen the movie.

I need to drink my butterbeer coffee out of this mug. It changes colors when you pour something hot into it!

If I can't "accio" my groceries back to the apartment, at least I can carry them in this bag.

I actually think this Horcrux ring is really funky/cool/pretty. Say what you want about Slytherin, he's got taste. 

...four snuggie knockoffs

three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s): awesome

[Find them HERE: shirt, necklace, mug, bag, ring]

P.s. Oh em gee, y'all, I haven't gotten around to posting about HP7.1, but it was SO so good. 

Bubba Gump Turkey Co.

In the days since we cooked up a giant-ass bird for Thanksgiving, Brian and I have been slowly working our way through the leftovers.

There were the favorites, which went fast:
We finished off the sausage balls in days. The mashed potatoes and peas were scraped out over the weekend. The pie has only the tiniest of slivers remaining. The cranberry sauce is only still around because I insisted on getting four cans (I tried to get even more, but Brian stopped me).

And then there are the forgottens:
I found the gravy today hiding in the back of the fridge where it had reached a level of gelatinous-ness that I am thoroughly uncomfortable with. The chicken and dressing also got tossed.

But its the turkey we've really had to get creative with.
We've had turkey, straight up.
Turkey sandwiches.
Turkey quiche.
Turkey omelettes.
Turkey stew.
Turkey cold.
Turkey hot.
Turkey on it's own.
Turkey in other things.
Turkey popsicles.

Okay, okay, no turkey popsicles... But we're not out yet.

study break

I am ten days, six classes, fifty minutes of teaching, one final edit of a profile piece,1,500 words of a feature article, one exam and untold hours of grading 21 papers away from being completely done with my first semester of graduate school.

This means one thing.

I cannot concentrate for more than an hour at a time on anything scholarly.
Seriously, the closer I get to finally being done, the less motivation I have to do anything. (Anything, that is, except surf etsy and facebook and amazon and youtube.) If you, too, need a massive distraction a short study break, feel free to peruse some of my favorites below:











The last option isn't as entertaining, but is extremely worthwhile and will probably make you cry.

for the love of the game?

As the roommate and ladyfriend of a true sports fanatic, I know a bit about sports. I spend most Sundays these days watching being in the room while Brian watches the NFL, I know what a "spread" is, I often inquire about how Brian's fantasy teams are doing... I even read sports blogs now and again.

And I get the allure of sports, I really do. Before any sports-crazed readers (do I have any of those?) come after me, let me say that I absolutely think sports is a worthy and valuable part of society* and I don't think that should be diminished.

But two things I will never get, or be able to support, are the money and the egos.

I don't understand how someone can make tens of millions of dollars a year and still say they "need" more. They "deserve" more.

People say that players should get paid that much because they bring in that much. I don't believe that. I think it's an insanely greedy catch-22. People are willing to pay, so owners and companies and players and everyone else involved get greedy and charge more and more. But people are willing to pay, so...

So $10 million stadiums are built and ticket prices skyrocket to pay it off. Let's not even get into how much a beer and a hot dog will run you these days. Before you know it, you've spent easily over $400 - and that's for nosebleed seats.

It makes me kind of sick, actually. And sad.

I'm sad that in another generation or so, only the extremely wealthy will even be able to consider going to see a professional game live. I'm sad that a kid who can kick, throw or dunk a ball well makes many times as much money as the researchers out there working every day to cure disease or work towards peace or help the homeless/impoverishes/sick/underprivileged. I'm sad that the real spirit of sports is increasingly being lost in personal drama (OMG Tiger Woods), fan anger drama (OMG Lebron James), ego-the-size-of-the-moon-drama (OMG Cam Newton), steroid abuse drama (OMG every baseball player out there today), and all the other ridiculous drama "news" surrounding the players, the teams, the owners, etc.

Where's the love, people?

* Particularly when compared with pop culture tidbits such as Bridalplasty.

On the Fourth Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

four Snuggie knockoffs! 

Me: We look goooooood!
Brian: What? I can't hear you over my embarrassment.
Penny: ZZZzzzzzzz

I know, I know. You didn't think the Snuggie could be topped, did you? It's a BLANKET with SLEEVES, y'all. What could be better than that? Well I'm not sure, but these four manufacturers gave it a try. 

#1. The Double Slanket (see above). What couple DOESN'T need a giant blanket with two sets of sleeves to make it easier to feed each other chocolate covered strawberries (or more likely in this apartment, pounds and pounds of chips & dip) whilst staying super toasty warm?!? Take it from someone who is always cold and spends the majority of life under quilts of various sorts, I can't imagine anything more romantic in the whole world than the Double Slanket.*

#2. The Thuggie.

For those that are too street and/or hood and/or gangsta for the original Snuggie. Sponsored by the Fresh Prince of Bel Air.** My favorite thing about the Thuggie is that the website describes it as a "pants optional" garment. My second favorite thing is that they make mini versions called "Thuglettes" which are tiny and adorable:

#3. The Musuc Bag.

I don't know what "musuc" is supposed to describe, but possibly it is trying to market this to those who live in subartic Russia? I can't imagine wearing a jumpsuit-slash-sleeping bag, but I assume it's pretty warm. And comfy. And bonus! In the Musac Bag, you don't look like you belong in a full Baptist choir. Yay!***

#4. The Snuggie for Dogs.

Okay, so this is technically an actual Snuggie, not a knockoff. But its still absurd. The whole idea behind the Snuggie is that you can wear it to stay warm but also use your hands. DOGS ALREADY HAVE COATS. DOGS DON'T HAVE HANDS. DOGS DON'T NEED SNUGGIES.**** Really, these are just fleece t-shirts and/or capes and will cause your canine to be mocked by all the others at the dogpark. Don't make your pup be "that dog."

Also, I just have to add, the wikipedia page for "sleeved blanket" is hiLARious and insightful.

...three Ed Hardy hookahs

two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

 Category(s):  ridiculous

[Find them HERE: Double Slanket, Thuggie, MusucBag, Pet Snuggie]

* I can.
** It's not, but it should be.

*** That doesn't mean you look good, however. 
**** Snuggles, maybe. But that's a different post altogether.

P.s. Shoutout to Rachel Brooks for first introducing me to the Thuggie!