new year, new things, let's see what she brings

Where does the time go, y'all? I cannot believe it is 2012 and I especially cannot believe it is January 15th. I've been really wanting to get back into blogging, but it almost feels like I am starting over completely - what do I even write about? I can't remember. Since it is the beginning of the year and the beginning of a new surge in blogging, I guess the only natural thing is to talk about beginnings. And ends - you can't have beginnings without ends.

2011 was a hard year for me. There were a lot of really great moments, like getting engaged and having fun wedding planning and visiting friends (usually at more weddings) across the country. Those wonderful times are some of the best of my life and I will always cherish them. They also helped propel me through some of the hardest times of my life. In 2011 I was pretty much constantly burnt out on school. I missed my friends and Millsaps life. I got away from doing the things that make me happy - like making things and blogging and going out with people - and became very insular. I slept too much and did too little. I was stressed about everything.

I worried a lot. I worried about money until I was sick. I worried about school until I was miserable. My worrying affected my personal relationships and then I worried about that.

I don't know how much detail to go into, but it was a lot to handle.

I've been trying very hard in the past month to let a lot of that overwhelming stress go. To stop berating myself for not being perfect. I've worked really hard for nine and a half years through high school, college and now grad school. I know I will continue to work hard in the career I find myself in. If right now I need to take a few days or weeks and chill out for my mental health, I will.

So the "ends" part was pretty depressing. Let's get to the "new beginnings" part. In 2012, I want to be happy. That's it. Of course I want to be successful and find a great job and make money and all that, but that contributes to the "be happy" thing anyway, so it doesn't really need to be mentioned here.

I wrote out some reminders for 2011. Not necessarily resolutions, because that makes it seem like a failure if I don't do them perfectly, and that is exactly what I am trying to get away from. But things I want to work on and remember.

Sleep in less.
Stay organized.
Cook.
Take more photos.
Read more books.
Worry less.
Craft more.
Follow through on craft projects I start.
Be active.
Get art.
Make a home that feels like home.

Those are my personal goals, the ones just for me and my happiness. But since this year will mark the official transition from "I" to "we," I have some goals relating to life with Brian as well.

Listen more.
Overreact less.
Compromise.
Respect.
Support.
Love.
And get a puppy!

Here is to 2012 punching 2011 in the noons.