a weekend at Mother Millsaps

It's funny what lends itself to a good blog post. We just got back from one of the best (albeit shortest, in Brian's case - thanks a lot, airlines) weekends in a long time. I laughed so hard I nearly peed. I did possibly irreparable damage to my body in the form of a Cool Al's cheeseburger, Julep chicken, OEC fried rice, two Cabot free happy hours and more. In fact, I am literally scarred from the amount of fun I had this weekend.*

But trying to blog it up is nearly impossible. There's too many things that, while hilarious in real life, don't translate well to reading off the screen. Or they only make sense to such a small group of people it would just sound weird to put it out there to the rest of the blogosphere (like that list of foodstuffs in the paragraph above that anyone not familiar with Jackson probably stopped reading after). Blogging about extremely fun, personal things is weirdly self-indulgent. Actually I think all blogging is pretty self-indulgent, but writing about something fun is even more so. It's enjoyable to the writer, but perhaps not so much to the reader.

A random moment or two might float up through the crawfish-filled memories the weekend that will hit the blog, but in general I'll suffice it to say that a) it was extremely weird returning to a campus that is more my home than anywhere yet I haven't stepped foot on since May, b) I have the best sistah family in the entire universe, THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE OKAY, c) the weather in the South is epically beautiful right now and it was especially cruel to return to a 20 degree day, and d) I love my friendys so much and don't know what I would do without them.

We are all so spread apart now, across so many cities and states and even countries. But no matter the distance or the time, some great things never change.

ANYWAY, if you made it through this self-indulgent post (especially if you don't know me, Millsaps or what in the world I've been talking about), I have a reward for you:

That is ED HARDY BEER.
It exists. And surprisingly doesn't taste as much like Jon Gosselin as you'd think.

please excuse my heinous posture, which is giving me
an awesome physique in this particular shot

*Don't operate a hot straightener while under the influence, kids. 

On the Third Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me

three Ed Hardy hookahs!

red, white and blue - as Amurrican as apple pie and baseball, by damn

Oh god.

Do people still buy Ed Hardy gear? I thought Jon Gosselin had made the brand synonymous with "douchebags" (the only good thing he ever did for society)... Regardless, this might be the worst of all the terrible things Ed Hardy has ever inflicted on the world. I can't even adequately write about it. Let's let the website description speak for itself, shall we?

Ed Hardy's art surrounds the water-bowl. Quickly the tempo of the Hookah builds up across small shades of art cutting across the Hookah's body-sparkle A third up the Hookah throat on the disco-ball are beautiful snippets of Ed Hardy's art. This art enters the Ash balcony constructed of glass. The Hookah is topped by a Beautifully shaped and smoothed Tobacco head. The Lightweight and aerodynamic hose is lightly touched with glittery-impressions running down the hose and then with its Ultra durable and flexible frame shapes itself across the Hookah's body.

Okay now stop. Read that again.

Just so you know, that is all copy and paste. I did not change a bit of that account. And you're not reading it wrong. It really does say: "small shades of art" "body-sparkle" "beautiful snippets of Ed Hardy's art" and "lightly touched with glittery-impressions."

Ignoring the blatant disregard for common grammar and capitalization, the fifth-grade adjectives, the awkwardly sexual nature of the description.... no, actually, you know what? This PERFECTLY encapsulates the Ed Hardy hookah.

...two handerpants

and an ornament of yummy sushi

Category(s): ridiculous, WTF

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