People who say that women can't be successful with a man, that they can't have a fulfilling career and a family simultaneously make me mad. But when WOMEN say it... that is simply unacceptable. I am infuriated.
Women have enough to overcome without suffering negativity like that from our own kind. They may think they are promoting feminism, but really they are just advancing sexism in a different way. That, in a word, sucks. I have always considered myself a feminist, but I cannot support this way of thinking.
Success in the career path I've put myself on, journalism, depends largely on access to the big stories (read: living in a big city) or digging deeply into interesting topics (read: spending a lot of time away from home following the story).
So that being said, would I rather be working for a big-name newspaper, covering the top stories in the world if it means coming home to an empty apartment?
Or taking a job that's considered less prestigious in order to wake up next to my best friend every morning, share dinner every night and laugh every day?
There's really no comparison.
Should I have to choose? No. Will I have to choose? Likely. As will my fiance. We will make the choice based on what works best for the BOTH of us. I will not follow him blindly – but he will not follow me blindly either. Equality is about making it work the best you can for everyone, and the best for everyone usually requires some compromise.
I am adamantly against the wage differences between males and females and nothing incenses me more than the glass ceiling, but turning the tables and making men inferior or unnecessary to our lives isn't what feminism and equalism should be about.
Sometimes a job will be worth more than a relationship, that is undeniable and I'm not arguing with that. What I'm saying is that when you find the relationship you want to pursue for the rest of your life, maybe a job and money and material success isn't worth losing that over and it has nothing to do with feminism or success or anything else – it has to do with going for the thing that makes you happy, and will continue to make you happy for years to come.
I keep seeing this Lady Gaga quote pop up on people's facebooks and elsewhere on the internet:
"Some women choose to follow men, and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn't love you anymore." — Lady GagaMy question is, your career might not tell you it doesn't love you anymore... but will it ever tell you it loves you in the first place?
